Monday, December 10, 2012

Missing someone at Christmas

I dropped Zoe off at preschool, ran to Target, and drove home. As I turned down our street, I saw an ambulance sitting there at the base of someone’s driveway.  My heart quickened as I thought of the people inside the house.  I don’t know them, but I can only imagine how scared they must be if someone was so sick or hurt that they had to call 911.  I said a prayer as I drove by that I hoped everyone was going to be okay. 

It made me start to think about my Aunt Pat and how she had a heart attack right before the holidays.  She was my mom’s sister and my Godmother.  She thought she had indigestion or something, and it turned out to be much worse.   She was in the hospital over Christmas and passed away a few weeks afterwards.  My Uncle Johnny, Aunt Pat’s husband, passed away days before Christmas, too.

I miss my aunt, uncle, and my grandparents so much, especially this time of year. So many things remind me of them.  I have my grandma’s Christmas tree (that my mom made)  in Zoe’s room.  It’s topped with a little snowflake ‘star’ that she crocheted.  (I pulled it out of her room for this picture because she was napping when I took it.)


And I was just telling Zoe yesterday how my grandpa would have laughed at how she seems to be hungrier lately; he used to say to us, “Are you eating again?!”  Making cookies always reminds me of my Aunt Pat and how she’d make bon-bon cookies – they were my favorite.  I can picture my Uncle Johnny laughing at all of the silly things Zoe does.  My aunt, uncle, and my grandparents would love Zoe so much.  I know they do; I just wish they could be here with us so that she could get to know them.  They were all such special people. 

I don’t say it often enough, but I really appreciate my family.  I hope they know how I feel.  I am so glad that they are so involved in our life and with our daughter.  I am very lucky to have them.



Deb said...

This post blesses me. We lost my dad years ago and he would have turned 65 on Dec 20th so this is always a super hard time of year for me.

So special that you have your Grandma's tree in Zoe's room.

Jessica said...

So glad to read this. I lost my beloved grandmother last week. This Christmas will be so painful, the first in my life that she won't be at my mom's house on Christmas morning. What a blessing to have such wonderful family memories. And I can only hope that I feel her presence this year. Loved reading your stories!

Elaine Pinkerton said...

As an adoptee, the holidays always seem to be harder for me to get through than most. Then, I see posts like this one, and it reminds me that I am lucky to be here, and lucky to have friends who love and support me. Yes, the holidays are tough to get through, but I should be thankful for what I do have instead of focusing on what I have lost. Thanks for sharing, and happy holidays!