So Upset Earlier...

The IVF nurse called and left a message on my cell phone. Unfortunately, I was in a workshop all day and couldn't really check my messages/or call her back. When I got to my car and listened to the message, she said that my progesterone was fine, but my estrogen was low: 128. The last time it was checked it was at 775, so that's a huge drop. She just said that I should increase my estradiol tablets to two a day instead of one.

After I drove home and really thought about it, I started to get pretty worried. Last time we did IVF, the same thing happened, but I remember the doctor saying she thought it might have been a lab error and not my actual level. So here it happened again, just a few days away from my beta. Pretty worried is an understatement. I was freaking out.

I talked to DH and he said I should try to get a hold of the nurse to ask her for more information. I tried emailing her, but the email came back to me. I decided to call the on-call line for the nurses. I'm so glad I did. I would have been worrying all night about it.

She said that there haven't been any studies done that show that low estrogen prevents you from getting pregnant. She also said that they have been doing their own internal study and have see women with higher estrogen not get pregnant and women with lower levels get pregnant. That made me feel better. She said they just wanted me to increase the dosage to bring it up a bit higher, but they are not worried about it.

I have been trying so hard this cycle - trying so hard not to cry, trying so hard not to get super-emotional, trying so hard to not take out my stress on dh, my family, or my friends, trying so hard to be positive and think about the good things that could be happening, tryng to just hold it together in general.

DH said he thinks I just hit a wall tonight. I started getting all choked up on the phone with the nurse and then after I hung up, I just started sobbing. I just couldn't keep it in anymore. I have to admit - I do feel much better. Maybe I should have cried a bit sooner :)

Things To Do During the 2ww....

Hmm...I'm hoping that this last week of my 2 week wait goes by quickly. I'll be busy during the days with a job-related workshop that I'm attending, but I know I'm going to need ideas for things to do in the evenings. I just don't want to sit around either watching television or thinking too much about Saturday's test.

Any ideas?

Baby's First Pics

This was our ultrasound right after the transfer. At the bottom "x" there is a little patch of light - that's where the embryo was placed.


This is a picture of what our embryo looked like on the day of the transfer.

My bloodwork from Tuesday came back fine. My estrogen was at 800 and my progesterone was greater than 20. Both levels are good. I had to go again today and have it retaken. Hopefully it will be okay.

I have been taking it easy. Bedrest for 24 hours. Now just hanging out around the house. Not doing much of anything. I get kind of antsy, though! Everytime I look out the window, I keep seeing weeds that need to be pulled. I just don't want to do anything to strenuous right now - it might be fine, but I don't want to think - what if???

Steve said he's giving me 5 minutes on the computer and then he wants me back on the couch :)

They transferred our one little 8 cell embryo. It had started to fragment but the doctor said it's possible for it to correct itself once it's inside me. As my husband reminded me, 3 "perfect" embryos decided to not implant last time, so maybe this one will.

They'll check my estrogen and progesterone on Thursday (of this week) but I won't have a beta pg test until June 28th.

Transfer tomorrow!

We got the call - our embryo made it through the night and is at 4 cells. We're doing a transfer tomorrow!
Could I be any happier?

(Well, ask me in 2 weeks!!!)

When I talked to the nurse earlier, I asked her why we might have gotten such a low number. I reminded her that we had done such an aggessive protocol and that we had less than with IVF #1.

She said I probably have a diminished ovarian reserve, but the doctor could tell me more when we speak next time.

So I may not have many eggs left at all.

Our Not-So-Great Fertilization Report

They called us about the eggs around 1pm or so. The nurse said that of the 5 they retrieved, only 3 were mature, and only 1 fertilized. We are pretty upset, as you can imagine. I'm holding onto hope, though, that this little one is a fighter.


Looks like I'll probably be back in on Tuesday for a 3 day transfer. She said one of her patients who had the exact same thing happen just delivered a little girl. So at least it's possible that it could still work.

DH calls them the Fab 5 - that's how he's referring to the eggs they retrieved today. He's been trying to make me laugh and to make me feel better. He's such a good guy.

Egg Retrieval Day

Today was our ER day. The doctor was able to retrieve 5 eggs. We were both pretty disappointed that it wasn't more. We hope that at least some of them (if not all) will fertilize today and make it to day 3 or 5.

We really hoped we might be able to freeze some, too, but I don't think it's very likely.