This afternoon's phone call...

Today I told more of my students about us adopting. They were really excited for us. I had some of my older students (3rd-5th) and they seemed to have more questions. They wanted to know about how adoption works, about open adoption, and if we would be able to name the baby. One of my students told me that he was so glad to hear our news because "it makes me all happy inside." How nice is that? And one of my other students told his other teacher that he was really happy for us, but also sad for the birthmother because she wasn't able to raise the baby right now.

I am really lucky to work with such kind, caring students.

In other news...

She (the birthmom) is at the hospital right now and we're waiting for an update! We're hoping that maybe someone - her caseworker, her mom- will call us later tonight and let us know how she's doing.

6 days...

I met with six of my classes today. I taught a 5th grade class, a special education class (with grades K-2), a preschool class, 2 1st grades, and one 2nd grade class. I explained to them how Steve and I are adopting a baby. I told them I wanted them to feel prepared so that they wouldn't be surprised when somebody new was teaching their class.

The 5th graders were pretty excited. A couple of them looked a bit sad. I know it's hard - I've taught them since they were in 1st grade, so I have had them for quite a while. One student even wrote me a note last week: "Another year in Art with you unfortunately the last (because she's going to middle school next year). I will always remember you from 6th grade to as long as I live. Thanks for your teaching and advice." She was unhappy today because of the news, but I told her how much I will really miss her and the other students. I also told her how much her note meant to me. She seemed better after that. One of the 5th graders asked if I would bring the baby in for a visit.

The preschool class and the special education class weren't too sure of my news...I'm not sure if they really understood that a substitute would be coming in.

The 2nd grade class was pretty excited. The first graders were the funniest. The substitute who will be in for me had asked if she could spend the afternoon in my room. She wanted to observe and see what types of procedures I was going over with my students. I thought it was great because I was able to introduce her to some of the younger students. Well, two of the kids wanted to know why I couldn't just let the substitute raise the baby and I could just stay and teach them! And one of the other students said he knew why I wanted to "babysit" - because I must really want to change a lot of diapers and be up all night.

Yes, they were pretty funny! I'm sure they shared the news with some of the other students in our school today, so tomorrow should be interesting...

Steve and I have both been nervous and anxious. He said he only got about 3 hours of sleep last night. I slept, but I dreamt that we kept getting the call that the baby had been born. I didn't know if the call was real or if I had been dreaming.

I wanted to say thank you to everyone who posted such nice comments after my last couple of posts. Thanks so much - it means so much to me that you are all so supportive.

One more day down...

Tomorrow I'm going to talk to my "Monday" students at school and explain that I'm taking time off this year. My principal had wanted me to wait until this week because it was a little closer to the due date. I was with the students this past week, but we spent time going over rules/procedures in different parts of our school. We did not have regular "specials" classes. Last week one of the students asked me if I was expecting a baby and another student asked me if it was true that I was adopting. I told them we would talk about it when they came to art class this week. I guess they overheard it from another staff person or maybe one of the parents. Some of the parents at my school know that we're adopting. It's pretty amazing - there are a lot of families in my school that have somehow been touched by adoption. I also work with quite a few people who have adopted. They have been a great support system along the way.

8 days...

We're down to 8 days until the baby's due date. Wow - in some ways the past couple weeks have felt so slow, but in other ways it feels like it's zooming by. Does that make any sense?

I have been back at work. The students started this week, so it's been busy. It's also been very hard to focus on work-related things! I'm really glad that I took a lot of time in early and mid-August to prepare for my substitutes. It made it a lot easier during this past week. Everything is ready, though, so whenever the baby comes, the sub will have what she needs to start.

There certainly is a lot of waiting with adoption, isn't there? The closer it gets to the due date, the harder it seems to wait. I have been busy with work and things at home, but it's not enough to take my mind off things, that's for sure. I've been thinking a lot about how the birthmom may be feeling right now and how this must be so hard. We still email each other often - I'm so happy when we get an email from her.

So that's where things are right now. We don't have anything specific planned this weekend, so I think I'm just going to try to organize some things around the house a bit more. I might try to work in our garden, too. And I'll be trying not to be so jumpy every time the phone rings! :)

Lots on our plate

Well, I was going to try to update my post with everything we accomplished yesterday, but I didn't happen! When we finally got home at 1am, I was so exhausted and pretty much just went to bed.

First we had to get up early and have our fingerprints redone. The "early" part was my choice - I figured it was better to get it taken care of...the clearances need to be updated because we had them done around this time last year. So that was first. That went fine.

Next we went to a used bookstore. We had four filled-to-the-brim bags of books to sell. Usually the guy buys all/most of Steve's and maybe one or two of mine. (Maybe he doesn't sell as many of ones I like to read? Not sure...) Well, this time he bought MOST of our books (including mine - yay!) We got $50. Not bad. I'm putting it aside...I have a feeling we're going to need to order a new washing machine soon. I'll be prepared for when we need it! (Not that $50 will cover it, but I'm adding my birthday money from Steve's mom and another gift to it. I'll save up a bit more, too.)

Then we stopped at the police station. They will check your car seat for you and make sure you installed it properly. Turns out that the officer who does that wasn't there yesterday. We got the phone number for her phone on her desk - we'll call her today.

After that we dropped off donations at Salvation Army. I had at least 3 bags of clothes, the extra books, and some other stuff that we wanted to donate. I'm clearing things out as much as I can, knowing we're going to accumulate more things, fairly soon.

We had 11 am doctor appointments. We also had to renew our physicals. Our doctor was out of town all this week, so they fit us in with another doctor. She was really wonderful. We also got our flu shots, so we won't have to worry about getting those later.

We had fasted for that appointment just in case they wanted us to get bloodwork done (they did) so we went to get lunch at Panera. (I heart Panera - can't wait until it gets colder - I love getting the tomato soup...)

We returned cans - lots of cans - at the grocery store and popped into Hallmark so I could get a couple cards. I had Hallmark bonus points/money that was burning a hole in my pocket!

We stopped at Staples and made copies of all of our paperwork. We also returned the ink I bought the day before and picked up the right ink. Oops. Could my mind be elsewhere??

We stopped at Walgreens and picked up my photos. Steve dropped off a prescription. Then we came home.

I created a list of names/phone numbers to take with us to the hospital.

I put our gift in a pretty bag. The night before I wrote out a letter to the baby's birthmom and put that in the bag, too.

I sterilized a couple bottles to take with us, just in case we needed them.

I paid some bills (not too exciting but they needed to be sent out.) I also sent out some thank you notes from my b-day.

Steve tested out the video camera, and we recharged batteries.

We mapquested how to get to the hospital and to a nearby hotel.

I touched up the paint on the armoire in the baby's room. I added blocks of wood to the inside. The blocks needed to be painted. My dad had suggested we try it. The armoire is an antique. It had a very old bar that you could hang clothes on. When I refinished the piece, I took the bar out (it was more rust than anything.) I added a tension rod. It fit perfectly, but when you put more than one clothing item on it, it fell. The weight was too much. So we added the blocks just under the bar. We also added two under that, so we could have two rows of clothes. I don't have a picture of the inside but this is the outside:
After all that we decided to go to the movies and just relax. I slept SO hard last night - probably one of the best night's sleep I've had in a long time!

So, what's on the agenda for today?

I'm working on a mobile for the nursery. Well, I will be working on it when I start it! I had an idea for something and I want to try it out.

We need to clean up the backyard (twigs/branches) a bit and maybe weed a bit out front, too.

I want Steve to show me how to use the video camera, too.

I might try to make a couple dinners (lasagna maybe?) to freeze. Any suggestions on that idea?

Plus we have general cleaning to do, too. The house looks fairly good, but I want to go over everything. It's going to be a busy week this upcoming week, especially with the students starting at my school. Staff started last week. I won't have too much extra time for cleaning at that point.

Haha - after typing out that list, I feel even more tired!!! I have to say, though, that it feels so good to accomplish so much, especially in one day. I don't think Steve would agree, though! He teases me and calls me a machine :)

Show and Tell

As promised, here is the picture of my birthday icecream-cupcake cake - it really was as big as my head!


This is a picture of my parents from July. They had come over to celebrate Steve's birthday. They brought Steve some birthday gifts, and we ended up giving them a gift, too.

When my parents found out they were expecting me, they bought that little jar for my grandma. It had hand lotion in it. They gave it to her for her birthday and signed the card from me (Baby U - due Sept. 16th.) It took her a few minutes but then she realized what it meant - that another grandchild was on the way.

When I was little my grandma gave me the jar. I kept it all these years. I knew that when I had a baby someday I wanted to give it to my parents to make our announcement, too. Well, when we did our IUIs, I had that little jar wrapped up. When we did our IVF #1, #2, and then #3, I had it wrapped up and ready to be given. Because we had never been able to conceive, it ended up sitting on a shelf in our closet.

The day this picture was taken, I had pulled the little jar out and decided I wanted to give it to my parents. Yes, they already knew our announcement that we had been picked, but it still seemed like the thing I needed to do. My grandma would be so excited that her little great-grandchild is on the way. I know she looks over us and I really wanted to tell my own mom and dad in the same way. It really meant a lot for me to finally be at the day when I could give it to them. Mom has it sitting right in her living room so it's one of the first things you see when you walk in!


This is the first gift one of my friends gave me after we found out! My friend, Dawn, who is the most fabulous baker, made these cookies! She gave them to us to celebrate our adoption news. (They were so good!)

We're busy working on other last-minute things this weekend. Hoping to get a lot done. I'll try to update again if I have a chance...

It sounded like boom, boom, boom, boom!

Today was the doctor appointment. Everything went really well. I had never been there before so I was worried that we might be late. There was so much construction on the way to where she lives as well as on the way to the doctor. It all went fine, though! It was cool because I got to pick her up at her home and meet her brother.

At the doctor's office, I got to hear the baby's heartbeat! Let me repeat that...I got to hear the baby's heartbeat!!! It sounded like boom, boom, boom, boom...very strong and very fast! I think that must be one of the most beautiful sounds I have ever heard.

So, everything is going well. We were able to spend a little time together and talk afterwards, too.

24 days until the baby's due date!

Update

I haven't posted in a while, so I thought I should maybe write a quick update. Things have been really hectic, and I'm trying to take one day at a time. We have less than a month to go until the baby's due date. Wow. Just wow. It's so surreal.

We have been trying to get things better organized around here. I still have a lot to do. It's not that the rest of the house needs a ton of work, but I'm feeling like everything should be in it's place. Is that nesting?

We hung up a few things in the baby's room, but we're still working on it. I may actually make a new piece of art to go over the baby's crib. I'm trying to get other things done first, and then I'll come back to that. The room is pretty much put together. We have a crib, dresser, armoire, bookcase, glider, and a rug. That's about all that will fit in there! We have other basics for when the baby will arrive, but we'll worry about the other things after.

Most of my time lately has been spent getting ready for the school year. I'm working up until the baby is born, and then I'm taking off the remainder of the year unpaid (except for a few vacation days.) I'm trying to get things ready for my substitutes at work. It's looking like at least 2 different people (maybe more) will be teaching my classes over the course of the year. Multiple people makes it kind of hard for me to plan. I'm trying my best to keep things general and to make copies of everything. I'm feeling pretty overwhelmed right now, but I'm doing my best to get things done so I won't have to worry about it later.

In other news, I am going to a doctor appointment with the expectant mom on Thursday. I'm really excited. I think it's so nice that she's letting me be a part of it. We've still been talking through email. It's been really nice.

It took 5 years to get to these next 5 weeks

"How do we know where our journeys may ultimately take us?" This is how the epilogue to Forever Lily, a story about an adoption from China, by Beth Nonte Russell starts. I read the book back when we first started considering adoption, and I thought we might actually pursue international adoption instead of domestic. The author writes about how, over the course of the past 5 years, her life changed dramatically. It makes me think about how our lives have changed so much over the past 5 years, too.

Five years ago this month we moved to a new state (well, new for Steve but it was the state I grew up in) and a new home. We scrambled to make the move happen in a short amount of time. We were closing on our home, and I was starting a brand new teaching job all within a matter of a few days. So not only were we setting up a new home, I was setting up a new classroom. The home we bought was our first house - we had always rented in the past. This was a HUGE step for us.

I started the new job and met hundreds of new students and many new coworkers. Steve continued to work his same job but in a new location. He had to meet many new coworkers, too. It was an adjustment for both of us.

We always knew that we wanted to have children, but we waited until after we had bought the house and we felt we were ready. Then after trying on our own for a long time, we moved on to a fertility specialist. She is a great doctor, but things just didn't work out for us. We got to a point where we knew that we needed to go down a different road. We had talked about adopting for quite a while. Even back before fertility treatments - we talked about it back then. When we decided to adopt, I felt a sense of relief. I felt like we had finally found a way to start our family. That this way might work for us. I felt a new sense of hopefulness that I had lost along the way during the infertility procedures.

The ups and downs are still a part of the adoption process, but I think we have felt more of the ups this time around. In the beginning, it was hard to hear that our profile had been shown but not picked. Part of you is happy that it's being shown, but the other part of you wants to know why you weren't chosen. Then we got the call on a Friday afternoon in June that changed everything. We feel really fortunate that our wait time was short considering what it could have been. We feel really lucky that we've been able to get to know the birthmom and some of her family. We're hoping that maybe we'll be lucky enough to spend more time with them before the birth of the baby.

I am so thankful for this situation. For us to have met her and to have spent additional time with her is a gift. We realize that not every adoptive parent has that same situation where they get to meet their child's birthparent(s). We're writing a journal about getting to know her - we'll give it to Zoe when she's older.

So much has happened in five years. So much transition, newness, starting over, beginnings, endings, emotional highs and lows. I wonder what I would have said if you had asked me 5 years ago where I thought I would be 5 years later. I'm sure I would have said that I would still be a teacher. I know I would have said that we would be still be a happily married couple. And I'll bet that I would have said "hopefully I'll be a mom." And to think...that looks like it might actually come true in about 5 weeks. Looks like our journey to parenthood might just be beginning...

Updates

These are two pages of the scrapbook I've been working on. Steve's mom has also offered to make a scrapbook for us, so I've been trying to save things for her, too. In the book that I'm putting together, I'm including things from our adoption journey as well as things we're doing to prepare for having a baby. Just thought I would post a couple...These two pages have to do with our nursery:



I've been meaning to write a new post over the past few days, but I haven't had the chance. We've been kind of busy with things. Plus I wasn't feeling great over the weekend - my allergies were bothering me, and I even lost my voice at one point! (Usually that happens after I start back to school and have to talk more!)

As far as what else has been going on...the expectant mother that chose our profile and I have been emailing each other quite a bit. It's been nice to "talk" to her -- I get so excited when I see there's a new message in the inbox from her!

She asked me if I would go to a childbirth class with her on Monday night. It was so nice - she even called me before the class and we got to talk a bit. Then we went to the class and learned about hospital/birth plan options. I felt really happy to be a part of that with her - it meant so much to me.

I sent her a message thanking her for including me. She sent one back and asked if I would like to be in the room with her when she has the baby. I am so honored that she would ask me! I don't think I could have smiled any bigger when I read her message!